Houston,we have a problem.

Harassed, flustered and frustrated… I’ve made the same old mistake of trying to do three things at once all day with the result that I feel run off my feet but actually achieved surprisingly little much else to my annoyance.  However, I said I would talk about some of the changes I’ve made to my diet so I’m here… let’s talk.

I’ve hit a problem. As you know, I have renounced “giving up” for the period of Lent. It sounded like a great idea at the time, but as I try to implement my Master Plan the realization dawns that, as usual, I haven’t quite thought this through. I mean, like most people, I’m sure there are things that I do. Habits, that I really aught to be quitting or at least trying to cut back. Let me introduce you to one of them.

MAOAM – little squares of fake fruit flavored candy goodness made by HARIBO. I started buying these a few months back in order to combat a previous addiction to another HARIBO product: Starmix. The reasoning was sound. These sweets come in a smaller packet; there are less of them so it seemed like a good idea at the time to replace my frequent purchases of Starmix with MAOAMs. I got what I wanted. Starmix and I are well and truly over, but these little suckers are addictive (at least to me) and the very reason I decided to buy them (the smaller packet size) is only making it worse.  They are cheaper and the box of the damn things is on the end of an aisle in my local supermarket.  It’s so easy just to toss a few in with my shopping. Sometimes I swear they have a Tractor Beam pulling me in. I can feel myself unconsciously veering in their direction as I try to pass in search of frozen veg. I am well and truly hooked. If it were up to me, I’d be having daily after dinner MAOAMs. It’s madness, and what makes a stupid thing even more dumb – even more unbelievable – I DONT EVEN LIKE THEM. They taste of sugar. How they can even put the names of fruit on these labels is a travesty of food labeling. They are sticky, messy and horrible.  I feel guilty as soon as they have passed my lips. I mean I should have standards, right?  If I’m going to eat something bad for me, there are a billion other things I would rather screw my diet over for. Most of what comes to mind is chocolate. In nature, I grant you, but at least I love chocolate. LOVE. Eating chocolate is delightfully sinful – like buying an extra pair of heels… or sex in public. I can’t even use a lack of available chocolate as an excuse I have tons of the stuff and good chocolate to M&M’s in every color of the rainbow… Hershey’s Kisses coming out my ears… mmmmm kisses… NEXT to kisses, betraying my beloved Hershey’s for these impostors makes me feel dirty.  It has to STOP.  It gets worse.  MAOAMs are actually damaging my health. I mean basically there only ingredient is sugar and for someone with PCOS which is linked to Insulin resistance, Alarm bells should be ringing. I’m booking a one way ticket to diabetes which is defiantly a path I am happy to continue on. I’m kicking the habit – going cold turkey. No more for me!

So, yeah, some things I will be giving up during Lent. It feels slightly weird after my brazen claim that I would not “give up” for the 40 days. Here I am, not even a week in, packing something in. Really, I should have done some forward planning; set up some rules; only stopped giving up on the plan. The only way that my twisted Brain can come up with – to keep balance of karma right – is that I have to take on something healthy for each bad habit that I decide to abandon. Sort of like an exchange.

I’m going to start eating a healthy breakfast – something I’ve struggled with for ages.  We’re told over and over that breakfast is the most important meal of the day and the one we are mostly likely to skip. I started looking around for a ideas. I need to start off on the right foot and find something that’s actually healthy or I’ll be defeating the whole point.  I kept coming back to a portion of oats. From what I read, there are many health benefits associated with eating a bowl of oats each morning, some of which include controlling blood sugar, aiding weight loss, reducing cholesterol and blood pressure. So, for the past few days, I’ve been having a breakfast of porridge when I get up. I’d say “breakfast” but suffering from insomnia, I often don’t sleep until the early hours of the morning, so its not exactly what normal people would call “breakfast time,” but its my first meal of the day (working on the sleep issue too). I can’t tell you of any health benefits in my case, of course. It’s only been a few days, but I have noticed a bit of difference in myself. I feel fuller for longer; I don’t feel as bloated and I’m snacking on less rubbish without even thinking about it because I just don’t need it. So, even though I’m not exactly enjoying this new addition to my daily routine, its making enough of a difference to me that I want to persevere. Maybe I can develop a taste for them

Never did take those pictures today… but there’s always tomorrow 🙂

Ali xX

K.S.: laughing like a kid watching contestants in The Amazing Race throw huge cakes at each others faces (I’m really lucky that I have access to my friend’s TiVo over the internet. Been able to catch up on some of my favorite US TV shows)

One thought on “Houston,we have a problem.

  1. Hey! Sounds like a POSITIVE giving up to me! Way to go Ali!

    I had brekky today too and am tryin g to think more about getting back on track with “structured eating” – proper meals, etc… Though this *munch, munch* chewing gum keeps my mouth busy, I’m sure OD’ing on it doesn’t do me much good & I know my system needs all sorts of nutrients too… (Talking of which, must get into habit of taking my vitamins too! Ooh, it’s Monday – good day to start!)

    On a plus point, I AM taking my meds regularly so… All good, I guess!

    Once again, way to go on the positive action, hun!

    Best wishes,
    Laurence x

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